The death of an angel

15370064_10210431148089280_6916637167674810128_oOn Tuesday, February 14, 2017 at 4am EST, My sweet little Guardian Angel Kitty Cat passed away. I held her gently in my arms as I felt the life force of my best friend, protector, guardian angel, extinguish as I tearfully cuddled her in my arms.

She came into my life 14 years ago just as I had begun to loose all hope on everything. Despair had started to overcome me… And I had begun to believe that every horrific thing that had happened in my life’s past… Everything that I tried so hard to find to look for that diamond in the rough road of life and try with all my might to change it all for the better was for naught. She entered my life miraculously, at the very moment in time that I had begun to give up. She gave me a reason to believe and fight again.

But, alas, we are mortals and we all eventually die. She was diagnosed with a mammary carcinoma.  I had blood tests done on her and her kidneys were too weak to have it removed surgically, there was nothing I could do to save her life.  At the time of her diagnosis, she was still pretty much her normal happy, content, playful little self.  The vet said she still seemed healthy and there was no reason to have her euthanized as long as she was still eating, and moving around as normal and there was no sign that she was in any pain.  She prescribed some pain medication for her in case there were days she seemed to be in any pain.  My hope was to keep her comfortable and just keep loving her in this world as long as the heavens would permit her to remain here with me. My only hope now was for her to leave this part of her journey in this life as peacefully as possible.  She remained (Thankfully) pretty much, still herself.  On the few occasions that she seemed like she may be in any pain, I gave her some of the medication just to make sure she wasn’t uncomfortable.   On the last day, she was lying on the bed and I heard a labored breath.  I picked her up and held her in my arms.  And then, seemingly, by the same miraculous way that she entered my life, she now was leaving. I held her to my chest, singing to her and telling her it was okay to leave and thanking her for everything she had done for me. I told her that her mission was complete. She had saved me and upon leaving this world she could now go on, (I need to believe this), to go on to the next chapter in her life’s journey, and that there would be so much more, so many loved one’s waiting for her to go onto… and that eventually, she would see me again. But, as it was her nature to be strong and my protector, she still fought to stay here with me… three breaths… Upon her final exhale, I tried hard to hold back my tears as I thanked her again with all my heart and soul for sharing her life with me, promising her she will see me again for we were connected and no matter what, she would ALWAYS be with me, the marks of her paw prints will forever be etched into my heart.

“Gabrielle, you will be with me forever… I promised you from the start… I will carry you with me always, you left your paw prints on my heart. ❤️”

So I thank you Gabrielle, my sweet guardian angel kitty cat. It’s time for you to return to heaven and run and play with my sweet little CJ and Dylan.. And I thank you for sharing your precious life with me and for saving mine. I am forever grateful to you. ❤️

 

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